The Real Adventure Starts After College

Upon entering adulthood there is something I have noticed among my peers and the job candidates I encounter everyday – people are working now more than ever.

Sometimes I’ll speak with job candidates who were working 60+ hours a week for their current or previous employer. The really extreme cases even claim that their marriages fell apart because of the hours they were putting in at work. Sometimes we’ll get job orders from companies that require 50+ hour work weeks. All the while I’m here thinking “What the hell happened to 9  to 5 and then you’re off the clock to do whatever you want?”

Then of course there are those of us who work full time and in addition have a side hustle going to make some extra money. Needless to say we also end up putting in countless hours working nights and weekends, the only difference being we actually like what we do – most of the time, anyway.

And so the entire notion of work/life balance has become like this buzz word for our generation. We saw how much our parents worked. We see how our society works themselves to the bone. And we’re starting to feel it in our own lives as we enter the professional world. Above all, we see the negative impacts it has had on the lives of others both mentally and phsyically – and we’re scared out of our minds to have the same fate.

So what’s a young lad to do when they’re overworked and bummed out by the (misinformed) idea that that’s just the way things are?

Make a change in their lives, that’s what.

1. Take inventory. Where are you feeling off-balance?

When we’re feeling off-balance in an aspect of our lives our minds and bodies certainly let us know. Maybe you feel achy in one part of your body. Maybe your brain can’t shut up about something and it’s dragging you down. Whatever the case, we know very well when something needs to change. We just choose to ignore it most of the time.

So start taking inventory of when you feel funky. This will help you figure out what aspects of your life need a little shift. Maybe your body is telling you to start exercising. Maybe you feel like you need to spend more time with your friends and family. Maybe you need to take a day off from work. Whatever the case may be, tune in to what your mind and body are telling you.

I personally do this with a little Moleskin notebook. Per the Rx of Gabrielle Bernstein I’ve begun to check myself every hour on the hour with the help of constant reminders on my Blackberry.. On the front of the notebook I wrote “Change Your Perspective Today” on a label. I’ve started to take this with me everywhere I go. I even take some time to check myself and write in it before yoga in order to help me set an intention.

2. Actually make the change!

While it’s very true that change begins with a mere thought, you actually have to take action. It’s easy to sit at your desk bitching about how you work too much while not actually taking the time to go do something like exercise. If you’re just waiting for the circumstances to change you’re going to be in the same state of mind for a long time.

Instead of just waiting for the change to occur, make it happen! Prioritize people! If you want to start going to the gym more often, put it on the effing calendar and just go. If you want to spend time with your family make the time to spend with them. Simply put, stop making excuses and start taking some action.

3.Don’t feel guilty if you can’t do something. Your work/life balance may not be the same as someone else’s. 

Oh, I’ve had a problem with this for some time. I’d overschedule myself thinking that I had to do all these extra activities to balance out my work life only to feel tired and give up on half of them. I would then feel guilty for not having achieved the coveted “work/life balance” picture I had envisioned in my head.

To quote my dear blogger friend Diana Antholis, (paraphrasing of course. Diana feel free to correct me.) “Work/Life balance doesn’t mean that everything is linear. It doesn’t mean that you spend the same x amount of hours at work and at play. It means prioritizing those things that matter to you and making time for them in your schedule.”

So now instead of running to a million different activities, which was neither balancing nor good for my health, I’m focusing on the few that matter. The best part is I don’t feel guilty about it anymore because I have finally learned that my version of work/life balance isn’t necessarily the same as someone else’s.

If you need some more tips on how to balance life and work, or if you need some stress management tools, check out my latest post for The Levo League, Managing Stress: How to Stay Sane When the Servers Go Down

Image via David Sky